My mom is coming home tomorrow. Home for good!! She has been coming home every day since Friday for day visits and has done wonderful. After her visit last Sunday and the horrible time she had Monday the doctor started her on a new medicine for her panic attacks and it has worked miracles. She is a new/old person. New from the accident but more like our old mom. She is very quiet and for any of you who know my mom you know she is not a quiet person. She says that she feels drugged. Which she obviously is. I'm not sure if all the meds she is on will be a forever thing or just temporary until her brain is done healing. I also don't know how you make the decision to find out. EEK! I can't imagine going through these last few weeks again.
She is going to come and live with me. My aunts wanted her to stay with them but my mom really wanted to stay with me. She is calm enough now and sleeps through the night so I am not worried about her safety or my kids'. I think she needs to be with Sam and feel like she is still his mom. If she is able to be here when he comes home from school and ask how his day went and then be able to tell him goodnight I think she will feel useful and I think it will help her recovery. Anyone who is a mom can understand that. Imagine loosing two months of your life.
We are still keeping her house. We will give it another month and if she isn't ready to be on her own then we will move her out. She still doesn't feel safe on her own. And normal day to day life is stressful to anyone and she doesn't have the skills to cope with that yet. She has been able to notice things that make her panic. If she is uncomfortable in any way she starts to panic. If she is hungry, tired, needs to go to the bathroom and can't because she is in therapy..etc all the same things that make us irritated but her reaction is intensified because she has to relearn how to deal with it.
Tomorrow will be two months to the day of her accident. We seem to have a trend. She moved out of the ICU on the one month anniversary and now will come home on the two month anniversary. I cannot believe we are at this point. Each day seemed like it would never end and that we would never get here. But now that it is here it almost seems like it never happened. I guess it's a little like labor. Horrible while you're going through it but so distant once you get your bundle of joy at the end.
I will never be able to thank you all enough for the love and support you have given me. Your prayers truly got my family through this. We have all had the strength we needed to get up every morning and face another day. Heavenly Father blessed me with the greatest family and friends. My aunts have been so much help to me and all of my extended family(friends included) have given us the boosts we needed. The phone calls and emails have saved me. This was a time in my life when I needed my mom's shoulder to cry on. That was obviously not an option but I found many others who were willing to lend one. I think my pops heard me cry more in the last few months than he has in my whole life. Poor Karl, I'm sure he wondered more than once if I was going to make it through this in one piece. But I always felt better after letting go.
I am so thankful for my faith. Heavenly Father has blessed us beyond belief. My mom is a true miracle and it has been an incredible journey to watch her progress. I hope that none of you ever have to experience something like this but I cannot say that I am ungrateful for it. Through our trials we grow and I have learned so much and would not want to give it back.
I love you all!!